Parenting & New Baby Advice Blog

Archive for the ‘Feeding’ Category

Before the baby, you were concerned over what to register for as baby gifts. Now you're concerned about when is the best time to wean your baby or toddler? The answer is, there is no real solid answer, and it is really a matter of when you or child is comfortable with weaning. The American Academy of Pediatricians recommends that babies be breastfed a minimum of one year, and the World Health Organization recommends a minimum of two years. This is because research has shown that breast milk is the best source of nutrition for a baby. Studies also show that in cultures where children are allowed to nurse for as long as they want the children usually will wean themselves at about three or four. However babies in the US usually are only nursed for their first year of life. Weaning is a very personal decision and should be done whenever mommy or baby is ready based on your needs and lifestyle.

It is recommended that a mother who is breastfeeding does not abruptly stop. It can be hard on the baby who has grown accustom to breastfeeding and can lead to hormonal changes during the first few months of the child’s birth and bring on depression for the mother. It can also make the mother’s breast very painful as her body still produces milk and it can bring on mastitis, a breast infection. Experts also recommend that weaning be done during a time that is not stressful as this is a big change for mother and baby and a stressful time can make it much more difficult. When you want to stop breastfeeding you should do it little by little over several weeks to ease the transition for mom and baby.

The beginning of weaning for most children begins at about six to eight months when your child is introduced to solid foods. Your child will be getting nutrients from solid foods and may not need as much breast milk as before. Try to start by skipping one nursing session everyday and try to make it a time that is not the baby’s favorite nursing time, usually early morning, naptime and bedtime. Instead of this session give your baby a cup or bottle to drink from with either formula or whole milk or it is sometimes recommended to use a mixture of formula and whole milk and gradually introduce whole milk. Keep doing this for a few days every so often eliminating a nursing session until you are no longer breastfeeding. If your baby does not want to take a bottle from mommy try these tips to get your baby drinking from the bottle.

• Have someone other than mommy give the baby the bottle and have mommy stay in another room as even her voice can distract the baby’s feeding.
• Hold the baby in a different position that is not like he or she is breastfeeding. For example hold them facing you on your lap. Once the baby takes the bottle you can cradle them again.
• Propping a bottle up is dangerous for the baby make sure someone is there holding the bottle at all times, the baby could choke because the bottle milk may come out too fast.
• Whenever you decide the time to wean is right for you just remember to take it slow and listen to your body and your baby.

Related Articles:

• Ways To Get Baby To Sleep
• Baby Diapering
• Bathing Baby

Face Recognition

By seven months, your baby may have begun to respond differently to different people. This happens as babies sharpen their visual perceptual skills and learn to recognize people by their faces, by seeing either a full face or a profile. Face recognition is a gradual progress acquired over the first eight months of life. Some babies can read their parent’s facial expressions too, because they are able to see subtle differences in faces. As with many developmental acquisitions, visual discrimination and perception of faces help your baby to maintain contact with you.

Stranger Anxiety

By six months, [sometimes earlier], your baby may have developed a very clear and strong preference for one parent or the other. This presence is exemplified by your baby’s crying and clinging to you as a new adult approaches-“stranger anxiety.” Babies in our culture often show at least some form of stranger anxiety.

One baby who had to be hospitalized for a short period of time quickly learned to cry hysterically at all people in blue coats because some of them were doctors and nurses who were sticking him with needles. Just think how much cognitive processing occurred inside the baby’s head for him to make those associations.

Another baby who infrequently saw his grandmother cried as she approached to hold him. It is natural for grandparents to feel rejected by a grandchild’s crying, but if the phenomenon is placed in the context of normal development, they should understand. If you have this problem, suggest that they wait awhile to become reacquainted with your baby before picking him up.

There are wide variations in the time when stranger anxiety develops and in the strength of reactions. Some babies always react more strongly than others. They scream hysterically, look terrified, and cling tightly to you. Another baby may give you a dirty look, as if to say, “Are you sure you want to hand me over to this strange person?”

When your baby’s fear of strangers is at its peak, it is very tempting to sneak out of the room when you want to leave him with a babysitter. However, if you do this, your baby may become more upset than if you tell him that you are leaving. Forewarning older babies and children, telling them what is going to happen next, is a useful technique to lessen and sometimes to prevent distress reactions.

Stranger anxiety may peak, seem to disappear then reappear over and over again over the course of the next year, depending on your baby’s experiences, temperament and way of handling new situations. The process of becoming independent is begun at birth but is certainly not finished within the first three years of life. It continues in different forms throughout you and your child’s lifetimes.

Babies’ temperamental qualities may affect differences in the strength of reactions to strangers, but other factors-the setting’s familiarity, the tiredness of the baby, and past experiences with strangers-may also come into play. Parents who bring their babies to work with them may find that their babies exhibit little stranger anxiety, because they are used to seeing so many new faces every day. What is important to understand is that your baby’s fear of strangers is a healthy reaction and a part of your child’s normal emotional development.

Parents as “Refueling Centers”

With your baby’s ability to crawl and move away from you comes the desire to use you as a secure base from which to explore. A developmental progression can be observed-your baby will first cling tightly to you, then move away, return for an occasional hug [or “refueling”], and then move off but continue visually checking in to make sure you haven’t gone anywhere.

While younger babies require a lot of holding, snuggling with baby blankets, feeding, and playing on your lap, mobile babies no longer need as much of your continued, close at hand attention. You may even be able to leave the baby in another room as long as you remain available and maintain some verbal communication. [Of course, you want to make sure that the room is sufficiently “baby-proofed” so your baby’s safety is not in danger.] In one study mothers and babies conducted in a two room laboratory, the babies would not let their mothers leave them behind in one of the rooms, however, as long as the situation was under the babies control, and they were the ones who chose to go into the next room, the babies ventured out of their mother’s sight and explored.

Your availability and occasional reassurance should be supportive of your baby’s exploratory behavior. Babies at this age, who are allowed this controlled freedom to explore with the reassurance of verbal contact with the parent out of sight, seem to fare better on later tests of emotional and cognitive abilities. Allowing your baby some freedom of exploration and control over the environment and not interfering unnecessarily with what she wants to do will enhance your relationship with her.

Executive Dependence

Some scientists have called this exploratory stage at six to twelve months one of executive dependence, when a baby continues to be very dependent on his caregivers, but also has some control over them. Your baby easily may become a tyrant at this stage-for example, he may cry because he wants a cookie and then becomes frustrated because he no longer remembers what he wanted. Your baby can keep you hoping, trying to second guess what his needs are.

While your baby’s continued dependence on you may be annoying and frustrating at times, meeting his basic needs is essential for healthy emotional and cognitive growth. Your responsiveness and your habit of attending to and appropriately acknowledging your baby’s signals, requests, and demands will enable him to become effective in his interactions with the world. That kind of attention teaches your baby to think, “If I do something, I can have an effect. I can make something happen.

Related Articles:

• Ways To Put Babies To Sleep
• Baby Teething Timetable

The majority of new mothers leaving the hospital today breast-feed their babies, at least at the beginning-about 60%. This is especially true for middle-class and professional women, which the majority of older mothers are likely to be. Age does not seem to have any great effect on breast-feeding. It is not commonly known that any woman who has had a baby can breast-feed, and that in other cultures grandmothers breast-feed their daughter’s children. Occasionally a much older mother may find it a problem to produce enough milk, due to hormonal problems, but this is rare. Many hospitals now give great support and encouragement to mothers who want to breast-feed, recognizing that it is the best food for a baby and that there are emotional rewards for the nursing mother.

The American Academy of Pediatrics issued a strongly worded policy in 1997 that suggests women nurse for six to 12 months, because of a strong association between breastfeeding and immunities for babies from a variety of ailments. But some women decide they do not want to breast-feed. There is no reason to feel guilty about this. There are excellent baby formulas available now that are made to match the nutrition of mother’s milk as closely as possible. Bottle-fed babies also thrive. Love is more important than the way you choose to feed, though many mothers choose to express their love through breast-feeding.  Breast-feeding is best for a baby because it is a living substance transmitted directly from mother to baby, containing white blood cells, antibodies and other substances that help protect the baby against disease.

We haven’t yet identified all these protective properties. It is composed of exactly the right nutrients for human babies and is produced in exactly the quantities the baby demands. After the birth a mother produces colostrum, a yellowish fluid rich in antibodies, which protects the baby from infection. Colostrum also contains protein, water and minerals in just the right proportion for the baby’s first few days, and a natural laxative, which helps the baby’s bowels start working. When the milk comes in, it is also perfectly balanced for the baby’s needs. The milk changes slightly in composition as the baby grows. Research has shown that milk produced by the mothers of premature babies is different from normal breast milk, and is ideally suited for them. When the baby first goes to the breast and sucks, it takes the watery foremilk stored in ducts behind the areola, the pigmented area around the nipple. The baby’s sucking sends a message to the brain to let down the bulk of the milk, and the hormone oxytocin the same hormone that makes the womb contract in labor and at orgasm-is released, causing the muscles around the glands producing the milk to contract and squeeze the milk through the breast to the nipple. The baby usually takes the bulk of the feeding in the first ten minutes or so at the breast. But enough milk is always produced so the feeding can last much longer than this. 

Most hospitals have made-up bottles of formula readily available. This is a great temptation to a mother who is having problems with breast-feeding and who is very tired. If you are certain you want to breast-feed, resist this temptation! It takes some time to establish breast-feeding and there are often some initial problems, but they should resolve themselves shortly. Some babies who get used to the bottle find it is more difficult to take the breast. Babies who have had bottles sometimes reject the breast altogether. Mothers who want to avoid cow’s milk because of eczema and asthma in the family should also resist the temptation to give a bottle. 

Special Smiles

Special smiles just for parents begin appearing at four months.  A smile will spread across your baby’s face when he sees you, but not at anyone else.  This behavior implies not only recognition of you-a cognitive skill-but also recognition of your specialness-a social skill.  This, of course, produces an incredibly strong emotional response from you.  It makes it more fun for you to be with your baby and to play with him.  In fact, it may be hard for you to pull yourself away to do household chores or return to work.  This, in turn, brings great benefits to your baby, providing him with two ready playmates to teach him the many things he needs to learn.

Babbling and Cooing

Isn’t it wonderful to hear a baby beginning to make sounds, to coo and babble as you jiggle him up and down?  Your baby’s babbling and cooing evoke a strong response from you, just as his smiling does.  Your play begins to take on a real conversational quality. Now each of you is more likely to take a turn-you respond to your baby’s cooing with words and funny faces, and your baby answers with more cooing and babbling.

Laughing

Some babies begin to laugh even before four months, some as early as five weeks.  Laughing occurs about a month after your baby first smiles.  A sudden, intense [perhaps surprising] stimulus can make a baby laugh.

But you may notice that sometimes your baby is not sure whether to laugh or cry.  Laughter appears to be an emotion on the cutting edge of fear.  Theories regarding laughter suggest that babies laugh at things that are almost, but not entirely, understandable to them.  Things that are too confusing, however, will make them cry.  Four to six months olds tend to laugh more at things that touch them [like ticking] and talk to them [like you saying silly things].

Your baby’s laughing helps form an emotional link between the two of you, making your play a lot of fun.  We like to see babies laugh, so we repeat whatever we did to get them laughing again.  By doing this, your baby is learning to gain some control over his environment.  Through laughing, babies can also learn the kind of effect they have on other people.

Feeding and Sucking

By four months, in all probability, either your baby has found his fingers or thumb to suck on in between feedings or you have offered him a pacifier.  Several factors may influence the amount of time your baby spends sucking just for fun.  More sucking is likely to occur particularly with breast-fed babies, when you begin to wean your baby.  [Oftentimes, weaning is more difficult for the mother than the baby.  That special dependency relationship may be difficult to leave behind.]

When teeth begin to erupt, you may see your baby chew more on hands, fingers, and any available toys.  Weaning and teething frequently take place simultaneously because of baby’s biting.

Most babies like to suck on something between and during meals.  If babies have the good fortune to find their own thumbs-some do this as early as three weeks-they may be able to calm themselves down.  Nonnutritive sucking [sucking for pleasure and not for nutrition] is one of your baby’s first means of exploration.  Babies use their mouths for exploring the world by touching and tasting all sorts are things.

People used think that the amount of sucking their babies did would have lasting effects on their personalities and behavior patterns.  For example, some thought that babies that didn’t suck enough because of bottle feeding [or because the holes in the nipples were running too fast] would grow up to have “oral” personalities and would be thumb-sucking school age children and smoking adolescents.

These early theories have not been upheld.  How babies were fed or weaned makes little difference in their later personality development. Frequent sucking also doesn’t seem to have any effect on emotional development [or on dental development, until the permanent teeth start coming in], so there’s no need to continually remove your baby’s thumb from his mouth or deny him a pacifier.  In fact, it is impossible to keep babies from sucking when they want to; some babies will even suck when they have nothing in their mouths.

The upshot of professional studies is that a child’s emotional development stability is not related to how she was fed.  Also, weaning has not been found to have long-term, resounding ill effects, either psychological or physical, on well-fed babies.  Rather, such issues as parental warmth, maternal responsiveness, and the level of conflict in the home are related to development of secure relationships.

Problems in Interaction

By as early as four months, your baby is beginning to develop a specific relationship with you. Your patterns of play with your baby help you to form a lasting bond.  But problems can occur in parent-baby play.

Problems in interaction can best be viewed as a breakdown in the play sequence-a misstep in the dance-such as mutually [a back and forth togetherness] and turn-taking are inhibited.  Sometimes the break is obvious to all concerned-as in child neglect and abuse.  More often, problems may be very subtle and can be identified only through frame-by-frame analysis of videotapes of parents with their babies.  Some parents and babies show a beautiful rhythmicity and “dance” in their play, while others appear “out of step.”  The misstep appears when what you expect to happen next just doesn’t happen.  An example of this kind of misstep is seen with a mother who turns away just as her baby starts to smile at her.  Problems can arise because the baby isn’t learning he can control his mother’s behavior through appropriate social behaviors of his own.  Psychologists would say that the partners in such an interaction are “noncontingent”-that is, one partner’s response has nothing to do with the other partner’s signal.  Babies experiencing this type of interaction can “learn helplessness” no matter what their signal is, they are unable to adequately control their environment [in this example, the mother’s response]. For this reason, it is essential that all parents react sensitively to their babies’ signals.

Another problem may occur if one partner in the interaction is overwhelming.  Some parents “turn off” their babies by working too hard to sustain their attention.  If, for example, a mother continues to intrude on her baby, moving closer and trying to coax a smile, even though the baby signals that she doesn’t want to play, the mother is dominating the interaction by not allowing her baby a chance to be an equal partner.

There can also be a problem with the match between the personality style of the parent and the activity level of the baby.

Unfortunately, there are no set rules or easy answers for the “right way” to play with your baby, except to be sensitive to your baby’s particular characteristics. Some babies are far more difficult to parent than others.  Sometimes, just knowing why babies respond in the way that they do is enough to free parents from any misgivings they may be having and help them get back on the right track.  The best advice you may ever receive as first time parents is to relax, have fun, and enjoy your baby

Recognizing Your Child’s Uniqueness

Every baby is different.  Some of these differences come from you and the kind of environment you provide.  But some of these differences seem to come with the baby at birth.  One of these inborn differences is in his temperament or behavioral style- that is, whether a child is “easy” or “difficult’ or “slow to warm up.”  Considering temperament is important because, unfortunately, gross mismatches occur occasionally between the temperaments of parents and their infants.  These parents are bound, therefore to “go against the grain” when trying to set limits for their children.

An “easy” baby shows biological regularity [in feeding, sleeping, and eliminating], predictable behavior, and adaptability.  Almost any parent finds this kind of baby easy to get along with because she quickly adjusts to parental routines and expectations.

The “difficult” child, on the other hand, withdraws from new situations, has negative and intense moods, and adapts slowly.  Although some parents take great pleasure in this type of baby, describing their baby’s difficultness as “vigor” and “lustiness,” more frequently, parents and teachers of “difficult” children feel threatened, anxious, and inept.  If yours is such a child, it is important to keep in mind that your baby’s personality is probably not your fault.  A difficult baby’s temperament often exists independent of parental attitudes and of management techniques.

Although, the “slow to warm up” child is somewhere in the middle, this baby sometimes causes more confusion for parents than either the “easy” or the “difficult” baby.  These babies may be frustrating because their behavior is often so unpredictable.  At times they are a joy to be with, but changes in routine seem to throw them, causing great difficulty for their parents.

Your child’s temperament influences the behavior and attitudes of peers, siblings, children, parents, and teachers.  How your child “fits” with these significant people in his daily life will dictate his patterns of adjustment to new situations.  If you think that a poor “fit’ may be detracting from your baby’s opportunities for growth and development, you might ask your pediatrician about the parental-infant programs in your community.  Parent-infant educators can often suggest some techniques to help make parenting easier.

From birth to about four to six months of age, your baby is only able to suck and swallow liquids.  His ability to take food from a spoon begins about the fourth or fifth month.  During these early months and for the whole first year of life, the very beat food for your baby is breast milk.  Breast milk provides just the right blends of proteins, fats, carbohydrates, minerals, and calories.  It also contains enzymes to aid digestion and minerals, such as calcium and iron, in a form which they can be almost completely absorbed by your baby.  Breast milk contains antibodies, which help protect your baby from infections and disease.  If your baby is exclusively breastfed, the incidence of allergy is greatly reduced.

If your breast milk is your baby’s only food, certain vitamin supplements may be recommended.  Your baby will probably be given vitamin K at birth, by injection or orally to protect him from hemorrhage.  Vitamin K is necessary to help blood clot.  If your baby has limited exposure to the sun, he may be given a vitamin D supplement.  Your baby’s doctor can discuss this with you.

Fluoride supplementation is a controversial issue.  Experts disagree about whether it is necessary or advisable. You should speak to your baby’s dentist about this.

Iron supplementation is not usually necessary for a full-term, healthy, breastfed infant.  The iron stores your baby accumulated in the last months of pregnancy in addition the iron obtained in breast milk should be sufficient until he gets iron in his diet in the second six months of life.

If you do not breastfeed, a commercial formula is recommended for the whole first year.  If you bottle-feed, your baby needs no supplements at all.  All the vitamins and minerals he requires are present in the formula.  Fluoride supplements may be suggested if the formula is reconstituted with water containing less than 0.3 part per million of fluoride.

During the nursing period, babies are generally fed milk on demand.  Breastfed babies will probably feed more frequently since breast milk passes readily through the digestive tract. You can expect to feed your breastfed newborn eight to eighteen times a day.  As he grows older, the number of feedings may decrease as he becomes capable of taking more milk with each feeding.

Bottle-fed infants often feed less frequently than breastfed infants because formula is not as readily digested and tends to leave the stomach less quickly.  Whether you feed your infant on demand or on a schedule, be sensitive to when he is finished feeding.  Even though it’s tempting to have him finish the bottle of formula you have prepared, do not force him-be careful not to overfeed him.

Some foods should be avoided during this period.  They include cow’s milk, skim milk, 2% milk, and homemade soy milk.  All are high in protein and mineral content.  The metabolic by-products of these would stress your baby’s kidneys, causing your baby to become dehydrated.  Skim milk lacks the essential fatty acids necessary for the development of the central nervous system and the vascular system, and it does not provide enough calories for growth.  Goat’s milk is dangerously low in folic acid, and if it is unpasteurized, it may be contaminated with disease causing bacteria.  Homemade soy milk contains no vitamin K and inadequate calcium [placing an infant at risk for rickets]

Solid foods are inappropriate before four to six months of age since your baby cannot digest and use the starches contained in such food as baby cereal.  Starting your baby on solids too early may cause diarrhea, impair growth, increase the likelihood of obesity, and increase the incidence of allergy.

Honey is another food that should not be given to your infant-in either raw or cooked form-during the first year of life.  Honey may contain spores of the bacteria that cause botulism.