Parenting & New Baby Advice Blog

Presidential commissions have confirmed the profound effects of television violence on children’s aggressive behavior.  These reports indicate that violent television programming is related to an increase in children’s fighting.  If you do not want to have a physically aggressive child, you may consider monitoring your child’s television viewing habits.  One way to do this is to count the number of aggressive acts in your child’s Saturday morning cartoons.  Then you can decide if you would like her to continue to watch them.

Cartoon watching also seems to have a negative impact on children’s activity levels.  While they sit and stare at the television set, they appear zombie-like; afterward, these same children act overexcited, running helter-skelter with little direction or content in their play.  In all likelihood, a steady diet of superheroes and monsters is harmful.  Also, because two and three year olds are unable to distinguish between fantasy and reality, the evil warriors and monsters may seem real to them, and the characters in some of these daytime “entertainments’ can come back to haunt toddlers at nighttime.  To make matters worse, it is often difficult to tell where the cartoons end and the commercials begin.

However, television can be used for positive ends as well.  Good educational programs, like Sesame Street and Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood, can teach your toddler many interesting things. 

It’s almost certain that every parent trying to find a good day care situation has thought of the sexual abuse that has been reported in the media. How do you know that you are leaving your child in a safe place and what are the different options? 

Breastfeeding can be a problem of convenience, though for some working women who are adaptable and willing to experiment, it is possible to have the best of both worlds-working and nursing. Your success will depend on your working conditions, your day care arrangements, your milk supply, and other factors. The tiniest of babies can be incredibly flexible, and you may be able to nurse the baby in the evenings and on the weekends when you are at home and have your caregiver feed the baby bottles of formula or your expressed breast milk. Your breast milk can be safely stored by refrigerating it for up to twenty-four hours or freezing it for two weeks. An occasional woman is lucky enough to find as a caregiver a nursing mother who will feed her infant charge as well as her own baby. 

First, consider your child’s needs. Some centers may expect your child to play quietly all day, others may provide a pre-school atmosphere with structured activities. Consider how many children will be there during the day, large groups may not work well for a shy, easily “lost” child. The point here is that the “ideal” daycare situation will be different for each child. One one-year old may be ready for a structured pre-school type day care center, while another may be much happier staying with a neighbor. 

Consider your needs. What hours will you need care, and what location will be the most convenient? And don’t forget to consider how much you can afford. 

The most difficult problem is leaving a baby only a few weeks old is that of finding adequate care for him of her while you are gone. Most new mothers who return to work leave their babies with trusted and competent relatives. If you do not have family members who can provide this care, you my have trouble finding a sitter or day care center that will accept responsibility for such a young baby, and charges will probably be higher than they would for an older baby. 

Car accidents are the leading cause of death in children after the first few months of life. Of all deaths due to injury, two thirds are related to motor vehicles. In the one to four year old age group, two thirds of the children who are killed in car accidents are occupants of a car, and one third are pedestrians struck by a car. It has been estimated that eighty-five percent of those deaths and sixty-five percent of those injuries could have been prevented by the use of car seats and seat belts.

Children can be injured by cars in two major ways. Children playing on the sidewalk may be hit by a car that jumps the curb, or they may be struck if they venture into the street. But more commonly, a child is hurt in when a car in which he or she is a passenger is involved in a collision. When a car stops suddenly, the unrestrained passengers continue to move at the original speed until he hits something that stops him. This is usually the interior of the car, but may be the ground if the passenger has been ejected. Children, who are at highest risk of injury in an accident, are those who are held in an adult’s lap. Not only is the child thrown forward into the dashboard, but he is smashed from behind from the weight of the adult. Even if the passenger is belted in, it is nearly impossible to hold onto a child in a crash. For example, to hold on to a ten pound infant in a collision at thirty miles per hour requires the same amount of strength as lifting three hundred pounds one foot off the ground!

To prevent an auto injury to your child, you must address the issue of safety from the point of view of each of the ways in which injury occurs; you have to consider both pedestrian safety and auto safety.

To make sure your child isn’t struck by a car, teach her how to respect the road and to walk defensively. Teach her to play in the yard or on the sidewalk, and to stay away from the street. Try to “keep the eye out” for her. As she gets older, teach her to look both ways before crossing the road. Be sure she knows how to read traffic signals.

To keep your child safe in the car, drive carefully and defensively. Follow the rules of the road. Don’t allow your children to distract you-concentrate on driving. Avoid having any sharp or heavy objects in the car that could be flying missiles in a sudden stop of crash. But the most important precaution doesn’t concern your driving skills, but rather one simple plastic and metal device-a car seat.

Nearly all of the states and the
District of Columbia require child restraints in automobiles.
Tennessee was the first to require them, in 1977. Use of car seats in
Tennessee increased from eight to twenty-nine percent in the two and a half years after the law was enacted. The number of children killed decreased from twenty-two in 1979 to ten in 1981. While states regulate their use, the federal government regulates the construction of car seats. Child seats must meet federal standards for crash protection, standards that are based on dynamic, rather than just static, testing.

Choking is the fourth most common cause of accidental death in children. However, for children under one year, it is the most common cause, ranking above even car accidents. In one recent year alone, 440 infants under a year old choked to death.

Children choke easily. Babies put everything they come upon into their mouths. It is a way of exploring. In your baby’s opinion, everything must be tasted as well as looked at and touched. Unfortunately, infants are not well coordinated, and small pieces can work their way too far back into the mouth and then get stuck.

If something gets stuck, one of two things can happen. If the object is the right size, it can completely close off the child’s airway, causing him to be unable to speak or breathe. Unless removed quickly, the object can cause brain damage from lack of oxygen, or even death. If the object was sucked into one of the smaller airways, the child will cough, wheeze, and have trouble breathing. Often such objects must be removed surgically.

Children can choke on anything small enough. Before disposable diapers, safety pins were a major hazard. Now, pieces of toys, balloons [even uninflated ones], and coins are frequent dangers. Some foods, such as hot dogs, grapes, nuts, and hard candies, as well as vitamins and baby aspirin tablets, can cause choking.

The federal government has taken action to prevent pieces of toys from becoming the objects responsible for choking. The Consumer Product Safety Commission has mandatory safety standards, and the Toy Manufacturers of America has voluntary product standards regulating toys with small parts.

Since children choke on many things besides toys, it is your obligation to watch what your child puts in his mouth and to keep dangerous things away.

Preventing Choking

• Examine your baby’s toys and clothing for parts that could be easily pulled off and swallowed.
• Don’t allow your baby to play with coins, balloons, or other items that could easily be swallowed.
• Cut or bite your toddler’s food into bite sized pieces.
• Avoid giving a toddler such hard, smooth foods as nuts, carrots, and hard candy. Also avoid foods that may become lodged in your child’s throat, such as hotdogs, potato chips, and popcorn.
• Do not give chewable pills or vitamins to children under the age of three.
• Teach your child to chew thoroughly, and discourage talking while chewing.
• If your child does choke, don’t put your fingers in her mouth- you may push the object further in.
• Learn the Heimlich maneuver, or the back-blow/chest-thrust maneuver recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics.

Set the mattress at the lowest possible level to give maximum side-bar protection.

Always keep the drop sides of the crib up to safeguard against accidents caused by faulty hardware or forgetfulness.

Use bumper pads for the first five months.

Use the crib for sleeping only. Never allow jumping or playing in or around the crib.

Place the crib away from walls and furniture to eliminate the danger of entrapment in case the baby falls from the crib.. also make sure the crib is not near curtain or blind cords, which could entangle or strangle a child, and make sure these cords are out of baby’s reach..

Keep loose clothing or soft toys out of the crib, they could cause suffocation. As the baby gets older, remove toys that could be used by him as stepping stones for climbing out.

Once your baby appears able to climb out, buy hospital netting to cover the top of the crib or consider another sleeping arrangement, like putting the mattress right down on the floor or on a small frame designed for a baby mattress.

Do not use plastic bags as mattress covers, especially dry cleaning bags or others that could cause suffocation.

Remove mobiles once a baby can sit up, since a baby could be hanged on the side straps of one. Mobiles are designed for visual stimulation, not for handling.

Changing Tables

Changing tables provide a safe place to diaper and dress your baby. However, if you don’t want to spend the money, an alternative will do.

To be functional, a changing table should be at a height comfortable for handling a baby without having to lean over. It should have a waterproof pad and enough space for open storage of shits, plastic pants, and diapers, or you’ll waste time gathering needed items for each change. There should be a safety belt that is wide and easy to use [but not so easy that the baby can release it]. Never use the table without using the safety belt-it takes only a few seconds for the baby to fall when your back is turned. However, don’t trust a “belted” baby to be safe if left unattended.

Commercially available changing tables usually have a long, slender padded area for changing and an area of open shelves underneath for storage. Most of these changing tables fold for storage.

When buying a changing table look for one that has high sides around the changing area to prevent your baby from rolling out. The covering on the foam pad should be of thick, smooth vinyl, which will make it easier to clean. Make sure the table is sturdy and doesn’t wobble or flip over easily. Many parents find it extremely frustrating to assemble these tables and get the legs balanced, so we suggest you purchase yours pre-assembled. Shelves should be spacious and open and very easy to use, many popular models have small, narrow, half-open boxes for shelves, which can be very hard to use. Look for a model that features stable side shelves for holding washcloths and other items. Attachable side pails for soiled items are also very useful.

A changing table is only useful for about the first two years, so if you’re on a tight budget you may want an alternative. You can use a wide table or even the padded top of a dresser instead. You can buy a special top that secures to a dresser to convert it to a changing table. But if you are going to use a top of a dresser, don’t put your baby’s things in the dresser- it’s dangerous to go rummaging through drawers to find things while holding the baby steady with one hand. You will want some kind of an open shelf system nearby, instead. Some parents construct a wall to wall shelf in a closet at the appropriate height and top it with a vinyl covered pad; you might also use a portable crib, raised to its highest position.

When using a changing table, keep diapers handy and ready for use, but keep all pins closed and out of the baby’s reach. Have a container of water handy. A roll of toilet paper attached to the wall and out of the baby’s reach and a wastepaper basket nearby will make the arrangement more workable.

Drawers and Shelves

What you use for drawers and shelves is up to you. There are lots of nice baby chests on the market. Don’t feel you have to buy one; it’s largely a matter of taste and budget. If you’ve already opted to buy a changing table, there may be enough space on the shelves below it, and you won’t need additional storage. If not, consider putting a used baby chest, or perhaps a used dresser that you can refinish for your baby’s room.

If you are buying a new chest, shop as you would for any other piece of furniture. Look at the workmanship inside and out. Are you planning on having a large family? If so, you may want to invest in a high quality chest to use for each infant. If you’re not planning a big family, will you want to use the chest as the child gets older? If so, you may want to buy something that will eventually look good in an older child’s room.

If you are using a chest of drawers, it is a good idea to install safety latches so a small child can’t pull the drawers out and have them fall on her. Also, once your baby is walking, you’ll want to be sure you don’t leave things like pins, on top of the dresser that your child could reach or pull down on herself.

Bassinets

If you are looking for a bassinet, here are some guidelines to keep in mind:

Make sure it’s stable and not shaky.

There should be no sharp edges.

Check for any hinges or clips that your baby could catch her fingers on.

Since many bassinets are wicker or rattan, you’ll want to be sure there are no sharp or rough edges that could be scratchy or itchy for a baby; adding a bumper pad to the inside might help. If the bassinet folds up make sure the legs have an effective looking mechanism, so they don’t accidentally fold when the bassinet is being used. Also, periodically check to be sure all screws and bolts are tight.

Remember that a bassinet’s usefulness is limited because your baby will quickly outgrow it. If you must watch your budget, you probably don’t wish to buy a bassinet.

Rocking Chairs

Some mothers could not do without a rocking chair; others couldn’t care less about them. Again, it’s a matter of personal choice, taste, and budget. You can buy one new or used. If it’s going to be in the baby’s room, you’ll probably want a style that fits in well with the décor and other pieces of furniture.

The major thing to consider if you’re buying a rocking chair is comfort. Will it be a comfortable place for you to nurse? How will it feel to sit in the chair and hold your baby? You’ll probably want one with an armrest.

A drawback to having the rocking chair in your child’s room is that once he can crawl, there’s a possibility he might get caught in the frame or push the chair and get hi in the head by it. There’s also the possibility that he will put his tiny fingers under the rocker while the chair is moving. For this reason, you might want to remove the rocking chair from his room once he is crawling and walking, or be certain you are keeping a careful watch on his activities. Or you can make special stops that keep the chair from rocking forward and backward.

Cradles

Cradles have a romantic aura about them, perhaps because they are historically associated with mothers and babies. They provide a gentle rocking motion, which can lull a baby to sleep.

If you’re buying a cradle, or if you inherit one, look for the following safety features: the slats should be no more than 2 3/8 inches apart, like crib slats. Cradles are commonly suspended by hooks, which can sometimes stick out and can injure your baby as you put him in or take her out of the cradle. Make sure the hooks don’t protrude. A locking mechanism is a definite plus; it will prevent an unattended cradle from rocking and possibly cause a sleeping baby to become wedged against the side of the frame due to the shifting weight.